NEVER backing down, NEVER quitting

So recently I had a craving to watch Face Off, so I decided to buy it, but only problem was that Best Buy AND Circuit City didn’t have it in stock. Outraged, I went to my best friend (ebay) and checked the prices. There were so many copies going for a couple bucks + shipping. WOW. I was about to bid on this one DVD for 1 dollar, when that same day I was in the mall and found a copy brand spanking new for $15 . I thought about it for awhile, and decided that $15 is worth a brand spanking new copy of Face Off. I speeded home and popped it in my laptop and watched the whole thing… twice. Well worth 15 bucks.

Good shit. Now as a n00b to ebay, I plan to sell off a good amount of my sunglasses collection. My 2nd pair of Armani’s, My 1st pair of Gucci’s, and my Oakley Gascans. Hopefully i’ll get more than $150 for all three of em. That would help me w/ money a little bit…

I saw this on a friends profile and I thought it was pretty interesting:

“You want to take the easy way out because you’re scared, and you’re scared because if you try and fail there’s only you to blame, but let me break this down for you, life is scary… get used to it… There are no magical fixes, its all up to you… so get up off your ass, get out there, and start doing the work.
. . .
Nothing in this world that is worth having comes easy“

It has been 6 days since my spring break started, and I haven’t been doing anything productive, so i figured i would update this blog just for kicks and giggles.

Going back to the gym brought back some good and bad memories. I remember when I used to work out for anger purposes only… Now that I’m back at the gym I’ve come to an understanding that the anger hasn’t disappeared but just blocked out. I guess it is a good thing I have some sort of control over my anger, otherwise I’d just turn into the yellow hulk again and that would be no bueno. I started up a new workout routine so that I can try to mold my body shape into something better.
Taking a look back to who I was and who I have become, I’ve realised that I have changed the way I view things in my life. For example, when I moved back to Arizona for the second time, I had the mindset of finding myself a good girl and being happy in a relationship. But now, I have come to the understanding that having a girlfriend is good to have, but I can do without. So if yall nosey people are wondering, no I’m not dating, and no i’m not looking for a relationship.
School has been pretty tough on me, because I haven’t been working hard enough. Everyday time seems to fly pass me and when I finally notice what time it is, the sun has already gone down and it is already 3am in the morning… haha ddaaaamn. Hopefully I’ma use spring break to set my clock back on track so I can focus on school. I’ve been distracted by hella movies and Counterstrike. Yes… I’ve started playing CS once again. Everytime I play, I remember back in the days when Justin would take me to PCbang after school to kick it with the “azn” crew.

Rest in peace my brother.
Rest in peace my sister.

The past month has been really hard on me spiritually, emotionally, and physically. I feel very dragged down and burdened. People want me to talk it out, but personally (and dont’ be offended) I have no more words to say. I already know what yall are gonna say to me, and I already know what is right and what is wrong, but I just can’t stop thinkign about shit like this. Honestly it makes me want to give up on everything and everyone. But why haven’t I done anything about it? It is because I know what would happen if I gave up on life. It is not worth it to end my pain so i can bring pain to my parents and friends. I often feel like I’m holding on to God by a thread and i’m trying to climb up that single thread but its too slippery and thin. But thats the only thing that keeps me going… that single strand of hope.

Ever since I got an Ebay account, I’ve been buying a lot of stuff through Ebay. I got some fake sunglasses just for kicks and giggles, and they actually look pretty nice. So now, my collection of sunglasses consists of: 2 Guccis, 1 spy, 1 oakley, 2 armani exchanges, and 1 fake pair of something I’ve never even heard of. I’m thinking about selling one of my armani’s and oakleys. Hopefully i’ll be able to make at least 80 bucks.

I’m feeling a little tired, so i’ll update this later

*edit*
i took my first econ quiz… first few pages i was like “GyeAAAAAA!!! i’MA TEAR THSI APART!!!”
the next few pages… owned me.. -_-

I realized I often blog a lot when it is the night before an exam, or if something important is due the next day… For example, tonight:

1. Quiz due at 11pm.
2. Hw (40 something problems) due tuesday at 8am
3. Acct Test tuesday at 10am.

I don’t know if the wordpress clock is right, but as I am typing it is 3:40am (AZ time)
How lame. I really need to step up my game when it comes to schooling. =\